I know it has been a while since my last post. To be honest, I’ve tried to write this post several times the past couple of months. I would write it, erase it, and start all over. I struggled to put into words what I was walking through. The boys turning six was hard for me. I started to feel like the boys’ window was closing. You hear of kids starting to speak at 3 or 4, but what about 6? God is going to heal them, right?! I began to doubt. Without realizing it I shifted my eyes off Jesus onto the unanswered prayer. The fear left me grasping for some sort of control over my situation. I would search the internet for answers, desperately looking for testimonies like mine that had a happy ending. As you can imagine, this was not at all helpful and only left me feeling hopeless and discouraged. I was upset with God. I was so hurt and disappointed. I started to look at God through the lens of my circumstances. Why would a good father stand by and not intervene?

But God was so gracious and patient with me. He asked me to pay close attention to my thoughts. He revealed to me all the lies I was believing. Lies that were effecting my perspective and not allowing me to see His goodness. He sweetly reminded me that what breaks my heart, breaks His too. He loves Jackson and Stafford, even more than I do.

Then why hasn’t He healed them?

BECAUSE HIS PLAN IS BETTER.

I do not know what God is up to, but I know He is up to something GOOD. I choose to trust Him.

This doesn’t mean that I won’t have days where I grieve. It is ok to grieve! Grieving doesn’t have to lead to fear or doubt. It can lead to surrender. It can lead to an embrace from our Heavenly Father that exchanges our heartbreak for peace.

I’m still believing that these boys will be healed. Until then, we will live our life celebrating every victory along the way!

Those who plant in tears will harvest with shouts of joy. They weep as they go to plant their seed, but they sing as they return with the harvest. Psalms 126:5-6 (NLT)

Quick Update:

We are currently working with a doctor that has them on a very strict diet. The goal is to reduce inflammation and heal their guts. We just finished week 2 with 4 more weeks to go!

Jackson- He is a performer! Loves to act out the dance moves to all his favorite Super Simple Songs. He will say/ sing words but struggles to use his words purposefully. I just love how outgoing and loving Jackson is. He lights up a room!

Stafford- I call him my little thinker. He is so smart and observant. You should see him put together a puzzle! He is trying to say words but I can tell it is still hard for him. However, there is so much depth in his eyes. I know he is retaining so much information. He is so sweet and I just love his precious giggle.

As always, thank you for your prayers and support! It means so much to us!